The Day I KOLKOLed
by Sushi Sensei
Summary: Italy is sick of the world stepping all over him so in a bid to show the world he isn't just about pasta, he swaps his white flag for a lead pipe and his "please don't hurt me" for "become one with Italy da?" Sounds like a certain Russian we all know?
1. Chapter 1

I don't own Hetalia

Italy was starting to get sick and tired of always being dubbed the useless weak one. People thought that they could bully him and get away with it. Okay so maybe he had a tendency to run away and his preferred weapon of choice was a white flag but really he did have an evil side! Just no one else had ever seen it (including himself). Well today he was determined; he would rediscover his evil side!

* * *

Italy peered through his high power binoculars he had swiped from Germany. He was currently balancing precariously on a branch outside Russia's house. Yes Russia's house. After thinking and thinking and eating some pasta and pondering some more he decided that he would learn from the best; Russia

Russia could make any country cower in fear. When Russia entered the room he had seen Latvia shake so hard that he would have put an earthquake to shame.

So he had set off to find him, and where better to look than his house? Italy had never really understood how Russia scared the living daylights out of everyone but here was his chance; observing the target in action.

Suddenly the branches beside his rustled and Belarus peered cautiously out. She was decked in what could be spy gear with a similar pair of binoculars around her neck. Upon noticing Italy she glared at him suspiciously

"What business do you have with brother?" she hissed menacingly.

"N-nothing" Italy stammered his self preservation skills kicking in "I'm so sorry please don't hurt me I'm not doing anything at all ve!"

"Then why are you in front of nee-sama's house, with a pair of binoculars?" she asked coldly.

"I u-uh I'll just be goin-" Italy caught himself before he could finish that sentence. He was here to observe Russia right? So for once he wouldn't run away

"I uh..."

"Spit it out"

"..."

Belarus was completely caught off guard with his response. It was almost cute; useless Italy wanting to learn from her nee-sama. It almost made her want to help him. Almost.

There was an awkward silence in which both Italy and Belarus watched Russia through their binoculars. Belarus finally gave in and spoke.

"Would you like me to give you some basic advice?" she asked vaguely "after all I've been near Brother all my life."

"Ve?" Italy looked up surprised "that would be great!"

Belarus nodded going straight to business "Well the first the thing I've noticed that strikes the most fear into anyone's heart is his kolkol-ing. You will have to master this along with a scary aura. Also the lead pipe he carries around as it is always good to be armed. You may also think of getting a long light brown coat..." she looked up from her speech to see Italy furiously jotting notes. She had never seen him like this. Seeing Italy a couple of times had made her conclude he wasn't really the type to stay focussed on something for long. He must have really wanted this.

She sighed staring off into the distance, thinking of her brother, not realizing she had suddenly fallen silent.

"Ve are you okay?" Italy asked?

"Huh?" she asked suddenly being brought out of her daze "I'm fine."

"Ve hug hug!" Italy said enthusiastically completely forgetting they were in a tree. Belarus dodged quite easily but Italy flew straight out of the branches landing with a massive thud on the ground.

* * *

Russia was enjoying a quiet afternoon. It was one of those rare days in which his sister hadn't stalked him so he was going to relax as much as possible. One found it hard to relax when there was someone breathing down your back chanting MARRIAGE MARRIAGE MARRIAGE.

All of a sudden a massive thud brought him out of his thoughts. Who was disturbing one of his rare peaceful afternoons? Donning his long tan coat and grabbing his pipe he went out to investigate.

Italy was sprawled on his stomach underneath a large tree with a pair of binoculars and leaves sticking out of his hair.

"KOLKOLKOLKOL" Russia chanted, a scary purple aura appearing around him, his pipe clutched in one hand at the ready. He had come out into the cold for this?

"Vee Belarus was right that's what makes you scary," Italy cried before beating a hasty retreat.

Russia straightened up watching the retreating figure kicking up clouds of snow. Italy was a strange little country. He turned to go back in.

"Brooootheeer~~" a creepy voice sang "did you finally come out to get married married married?"

And the day had started out so well.

* * *

Author's notes: hi this is my first time writing fan fiction :D

Please try not to flame too much unfortunately I don't have a fire extinguisher D: but advice and stuff is welcomed (:

R&R?


	2. Chapter 2

Italy stared at himself in the bathroom mirror.

"Kolkolkolkolkol," he chanted.

No this would not do he needed to create that scary purple atmosphere.

"Kolkolkolkolkol," he tried again.

Italy was at Germany's house for a sleepover but he had abandoned sleeping in favour of practicing his Kol chant. Belarus had claimed that Russia's Kol-ing was what scared people the most so Italy had decided to practice that first. He was having trouble conjuring up a threatening atmosphere though.

This time he glared at the mirror "KOLKOLKOLKOL,"

That was eerily similar to Russia's real kolkolkol.

Prussia had woken from a bad dream where Russia's kolkolkol chant had been haunting him. He groggily sat up. Wait was he hearing right? Was that kolkolkol-ing from the bathroom across the hall? And to make matters worse he really needed to use the toilet.

"The awesome is not scared of anything," he muttered to himself as he ventured out of his bed.

He reached the hallway without incident and out his hand on the doorknob. "See? It was just his overactive imagination."

Suddenly the most terrifying thing ever happened.

"KOLKOLKOLKOL," A creepy purple fog leaked out of the bathroom.

Prussia would later deny what happened next.

He screamed like a little girl and ran towards Germany's room. Diving under the covers he screamed "WEEESSST! RUSSSIAAAS IN OUR BATHROOOM!"

Anyone would have heard Prussia's ear splitting shriek. On the other side of the world America momentarily woke up to say "stupid commie," before falling back asleep.

Italy was no exception.

"Ve? Russia's in this bathroom?" he cried in distress.

But he was going to be brave, right? As far as he could see Russia wasn't around but he could be hiding in the shadows. Suddenly the shadows seemed darker and more ominous. This was enough to send Italy running for Germany.

"DOITSUU DOITSUU HELP MEEE!" Italy cried doing a nosedive into Germany's bed.

And so, Germany found himself sandwiched between two terrified nations at around two in the morning.

A/N I don't own Hetalia

R&R?


	3. Chapter 3

Italy woke to find the sun shining brightly. He could hear clanking in the kitchen meaning Germany was already up. Yawning he rolled over onto his belly, only to hit a warm lump. A red eyed white haired lump.

"Ve~ Prussia nee-chan? What are you doing in Germany's bed?"

Prussia blearily opened his eyes

"Ehh? Italy? I'm..." Prussia remembered the events of last night "I just thought id honour west with my awesome presence heh heh..."

"Last night," Prussia thought, embarrassed. That was totally not awesome and downright degrading. But what could you expect? It was dark and plus there was that sinister purple atmosphere spilling out. But the last thing he wanted was anyone to find out. He would be the laughing stock of the rest of the world.

"So Ita-chan... ehh? Where did he go?" Prussia blinked wasn't Italy here just a moment ago?  
"Ah well," he thought snuggling back under the covers "that kid was so energetic..."

* * *

Italy had grown bored with Prussia's silence and had set off downstairs. Today he would try to obtain that long coat and scarf Russia wore so he was heading to that department store near here.

Ignoring the smell of breakfast Italy called out "Bye Germany I'll be going no ve."

Not waiting for an answer Italy shut the front door and headed off.

* * *

"Vee this is perfect," Italy told the saleswoman as he inspected the pale pink scarf; so soft and warm.

"Alrighty then that will be... $350 dollars please."

"WHAAT?" Italy's jaw hit the ground "$350 for just this scarf?"

"Umm yes sir its cashmere and-"

Before the saleswomen could finish Italy resignedly forked out $350. If it was so expensive here itll be even more expensive somewhere else right? After all this was a warehouse it advertised all the cheapest prices in designer wear, whatever designer meant. All the pasta he could have bought with that money. Accepting his (overpriced) scarf Italy headed out of the Burberry store. Now he only needed to get the coat.

But after 3 hrs of fruitless searching try as he might Italy could not find a coat like Russia's. It seemed there was only one solution, and he was not looking forward to it.

* * *

"So what was it you wanted to discuss with me Italy?" England asked.

England being the proper English gentleman he was had made tea and a plate of what could be called scones –ahem- for Italy.

Italy still remembered what happened last time he had encountered those scones.

"Uh I was w-wondering seeing as you're so good at sewing and stuff... c-couldyoumakemethiscoat" he rushed out shoving the rough draft he had drawn of Russia's coat into England's face.

After examining it England nodded "I'll call you when it's ready, it should only take a day or so as I have the fabric."

"T-thank you so much England ve~ you're not as bad as I thought" Italy said happily.

"Err.. Yes" England muttered not sure if it was a compliment or insult "Would you like some scones?"

Italy eyed the scones warily. He was brave now wasn't he? The only reason he was scared of England was because of his terrible cooking. If he could get rid of his fear of scones then it would make him really brave right?

Accepting two scones Italy held his breath and shoved one into his mouth. He experimentally put it on his tongue. Hey it didn't taste like anything. This was so easy he could have laughed. But then it hit him

"Aack.." Italy chocked. The disgusting flavours of garlic, blue cheese and ...what seemed to be FINISH detergent?

"E-England.. What d-do you p-put in this," Italy forced out his face a pale shade of green

England gasped thinking that Italy wanted the recipe. No one had managed to keep his scones in their mouth for longer than a few seconds let alone swallow.

"I'll give you the recipe 'kay?" England said cheerily before rushing off into the kitchen.

"Ugh" Italy moaned spitting out the scone in a conveniently located pot plant. He needed something strong to get rid of the disgusting after taste, now. He stood up and was about to rush off but in a rare moment of insight grabbed the other scone shoving it into his pant pocket, if England was happy he would make the coat faster right?

"ENGLAND SORRY I HAVE TO GO BYE THANKS FOR EVERYTHING!" Italy yelled making a quick escape.

Before going home Italy stopped at a convenience store and bought a jar of jalapeño chillies. He downed the whole jar and chewed furiously. The result was not pleasant, if having massive amounts of steam come out of your ears was anything to go by, but it was much better than the taste of England's scones.

* * *

England was quite disappointed that Italy had left so quickly. No one had ever expressed interest in how he made his scones. As he was clearing away his bench tops he noticed a bottle with butter in big block letters but as he squinted he could see in small print 'cleans away all.' It didn't take a genius to put two and two together. Yes he had used detergent in his scones instead of butter.

"Oh dear" England muttered but then immediately brightened up. "Wait he liked it right? So that means detergent must have made my scones taste nicer!"

He immediately picked up his phone and dialled America's number.

"Hey America I made a new scone recipe even Italy liked it, you should come try it," he said in one big breath

* * *

A/N I don't own Hetalia

This is the longest chapter yet

Don't worry next chapter Italy's gonna be released onto the world *thinks of apocalyptic scene*  
oh yeah the scarf really does exist. It was on this Burberry website and it looked exactly like Russia's scarf ^^

Also how many chapters do you think this story should be roughly?


	4. Chapter 4

A/N hi :D i just realized that i forgot about Russias pipe so the first few paragraphs of this chapter will b about that and then Italys fury shall be released XD

Oh yeah I don't own Hetalia

* * *

Italy put down his spanner and inspected his handiwork. He was not by any length a great plumber but he had to admit the toilet looked as good as new.

Italy just needed the last item on his checklist. Russia always carried around a lead pipe and Belarus had mentioned that it was important. She had even sent him a detailed drawing of where the pipe would be located underneath a toilet. It had been relatively easy to find because it was one of the main pipes so Italy had sawn in out and simply put the toilet back on.

His plan was all falling into place. He had the coat and pipe and he had mastered his KOLKOLKOL. Now he would show everyone his evil side during the world conference today.

Remembering he needed pants Italy pulled on the same pair of pants he wore yesterday and rushed out of Germany's house.

* * *

Germany was fiddling with a GPS trying to work out how to get from his house to the conference centre. It was being held in Germany this year but he needed directions.

He ran a hand through his hair and finally gave up throwing it aside and standing up, about to use the bathroom. Technology these days always gave him the urge to go to the bathroom.

...

He tried pressing the flush button. Nothing happened. He tried again. And again.

"What on earth?" Germany muttered to himself.

When he concentrated, he could hear a very faint sound of water gushing.

Suddenly the toilet exploded. In his face.

* * *

"...and Italy even asked for my recipe," England boasted to the slightly green faced nations sitting around a large table.

Germany was grovelling in his chair. His usually perfectly gelled hair was damp and sticking up in all directions plus there was a massive bruise forming on his head. (Random A/N Can anyone guess why?) Really what had he done to deserve this?

All the nations had gathered except America, Italy and Russia. Russia had said he might come later in the afternoon because he was slightly injured from jumping out of a second story window to try get away from his crazy sister Belarus, America wasn't coming because he had been throwing up his guts for the past few days (England squirmed nervously under his gaze) and well Italy being late was just to be expected.

* * *

Outside the door Italy was having his own problems. He really wanted to go right back and revert to his old ways. But he had to do this he had everything ready. Italy steeled himself. His hand grasped the doorknob. Get this over and done with. He flung the door open.

"KOLKOLKOLKOL," Italy chanted shrouded in the mysterious purple fog.

Suddenly all attention was on him. Jaws hit the ground. Pens slipped from loose grasps. A frying pan fell out of Hungary's hand. Austria played a wrong chord. At that moment 2012 was a small issue.

Latvia fainted.

That was probably what brought everyone out of their shock induced mental breakdowns. In the next instant two things happened at once;

"ENGLANND! YOU'VE OBVIOUSLY POISONED ITALY WITH YOUR SCONES! WE DON'T NEED ANOTHER RUSSIA IN THIS WORLD," France yelled standing so fast his chair toppled over.

"PRUSSIA HAVE YOU BEEN INFLUENCING ITALY?" Germany yelled slamming a fist into the table.

"I'LL HAVE TO CORRECT YOU, MY COOKING IS PERFECT!" England shouted diving at France, fingers wrapping around France's neck, shaking him.

Spain perked up seeing it as the perfect opportunity for some long overdue revenge. He still wasn't quite over his armada yet. Whipping out his huge axe, tomato charm attached, he charged at the two yelling.

"Influencing sweet innocent Italy is UNFORGIVABLE." Hungary seemed to have picked up her frying pan and was punctuating every word with a hit.

"Hey stop hitting the awesome me OW!" Prussia yelled.

There was total pandemonium.

The meeting room was a goner. Chairs were smashed, the table overturned. At one point someone had bumped into Lichtenstein. Guns immediately vaporized in Switzerland's hands. The room was peppered with bullets. Spain turned out to be hitting England on the head with the tomato charm on his axe.

Amongst all this mess stood Italy. He really wanted everyone to stop.

"KOLKOLKOL. Please stop fighting you will all become one with Italy anyway!" Italy cried. There that sounded like something Russia would say.

Suddenly it was silent.

The same thought was going through everyone's heads. Since when had Italy become so damn scary?

Italy on the other hand was delighted. "Everyone please let us continue our meeting da?" Italy said. No one had ever payed him that much attention. Or listened to him like that. It was working!

* * *

A/N hello again

Haven't written for a while 8D but next chapter Italy shall continue his rampage (Y)

Ure reviews r my fuel!


	5. Chapter 5

A/N Thank u for all those reviews ^_^ they motivate me.. ALOT :D  
also thanks to Starscream-CharSiew for pointing out nee san actually means big sister oops XD

And.. I'm going to make a side story bout what happened when America goes over to Englands house to eat scones.

"..and I suggest we make the world's national dish pastaaaa!" Italy rattled on his long list of absurd ideas.

Everyone had recovered from the fight (or lost the will to after hearing Italy KOL) and now they were continuing on with their meeting. So far Italy had taken America's place at the head of the table and was listing random stupid ideas, that everyone agreed to out of fright.

"Oh and also I say we ban England from cooking..."

"That is absolutely preposterous," England said immediately standing up, a tomato shaped bruise on his head.

Italy didn't respond. He simply stared at England, his stare boring into him. But before he could KOL or open his mouth England quickly squeaked "um...I hope you'll find time to rethink..." His voice did NOT just go up a pitch.

"Alright now that that's settled let's move on..." Italy said averting his gaze from England.

That was a successful meeting Italy thought as he walked out of the meeting room into the long corridors. They had finally gotten something done. So far he had enforced these (unfair) laws onto the countries;

You must eat Pasta at least one meal a day

Germany cannot clean or run his daily training sessions

France Nii-san shouldn't scare people by taking his clothing off

England may not cook no matter what

China cannot say aru after his sentences

...

And the list went on.

No one had disagreed with him and Lithuania had even bought him tea. Italy was extremely happy with his progress.

Germany sat with his head on the table in his dining room. To tell the truth he was still a bit scared of Russia after WW2. And now Italy acting like him was just terrifying. Who thought the sweet innocent Italian who always came to him for help would one day scare the living daylights out of him?

No Italy didn't scare him...one little bit..

But he had been pretty terrifying

Shut up brain. He at least needed his brain to be on his side.

Germany raised his head a few centimetres from the table and slammed it down. Now he was really stressed, on top of dealing with the idiots who called themselves nations, now Italy had obviously snapped.

And to make matters worse Italy had forbid him from cleaning.

Wait since when did he listen to Italy.

Yeah he would not listen to Italy. Germany immediately stood up and reached for his feather duster but a few centimetres away his hand started shaking. Did he want to face the wrath of Italy? He had seen the pipe Italy now carried around.

He put his hand down. He reached for the feather duster again. He put his hand down.

This continued for 5 minutes. By then Germany had turned blue, was shaking and had squeezed his eyes shut. He sat down and stared at his feather duster indecisively.

Never had France kept his clothing on for the full extent of the meeting, or for 2 whole hours after.

Right now he was walking down the street trying to take his mind off things. It was as plain as day to France. England has obviously poisoned Italy. Italy had turned Russian. Italy had gone to the dark side. Italy had... stopped him from spreading the love.

"NOOOOOO," France wailed dramatically, forgetting that he was in the middle of the street, in broad daylight.

Everyone stared at him weirdly.

His fingers twitched and with all his willpower refrained from taking any piece of clothing off.

He was having a withdrawal.

England was having a breakdown. How long had it been? 4 hours? 5? No he was sure it had been 6 hours. It was around 11 pm and England was positive he hadn't cooked anything disgusting for at least 6 hours.

Cooking was his form of stress relief just like cleaning was Germany's. So now he hadn't cooked for 6 hours. He was on the verge of self destruction.

Calmly England walked to the cabinet where he kept all of his alcoholic drinks. Within a matter of seconds he was drunk.

"..Will there be anything else sir?" the saleswoman asked merrily

"No thank you that'll be it ar- a.. ar..." China clamped his mouth shut before nodding and walking off.

Life was not fair. Why would Italy stop him from saying aru? He could understand why Italy would stop England from cooking and France from taking his clothing off but stopping him from saying aru was completely pointless. Now after every sentence he stuttered a..ar.. before really wanting to bang his head somewhere solid.

China groaned before banging his head into a nearby wall for what could be the 31st time that day.

A/N i think is said everything before the story lol XD

R&R?


	6. Chapter 6

A/N hello long time no update srry ive been busy with school and stuff and also fanfiction kinda screwed up adn you couldn't upload D;

U may or may not have noticed but i changed my pen name so yeh XD

OMG 49 REVIEWS! *DIES*

THANK YOU EVERYONE WHO REWIEWED :D

* * *

"WE NEED TO FIND A SOLUTION TO THIS PROBLEM IMMEDIATELY," Germany thundered punctuating each word with a palm to the table.

There were a few panicked "not so loud! Italy will hear"s in different languages and one miserable "Oww my headache," from the corner where England was nursing his hangover. A few of the nations; France, England, China and Germany had gathered together in the breaks between world meetings to discuss what they should do about the new Italy.

"I really think Italy was poisoned by England. He was wise in banning England from cooking," France said fiddling with his tie. He had large bags under his eyes and had obviously not slept "America was completely KO-ed by England's scones, they should be classified as weapons"

England didn't even bother to defend his cooking, he was too busy agonizing over how his life sucked in his little corner.

"Look, we might not be able to fix this problem immediately but i think we should arm ourselves with something as so not to get hurt." Germany said sensibly.

There was a murmur of agreement throughout the room. Trust Germany to be the most sensible.

Throughout the whole thing, China hadn't spoken one word. He had decided that if he was going to stutter like an idiot after every sentence he might as well not speak. So now as Germany and France were discussing what sort of weapons they could use that wouldn't actually kill Italy, China had some time to ponder.

Something that wouldn't kill Italy but just keep him away long enough for China to run away.

Pepper spray...

...

...

...

"Guys we could use pepper spray aru," China blurted out before immediately clapping his hands over his mouth.

There was a moment of stunned silence. China didn't know if it was because he had broken one of the sacred Italian rules or just because everyone was so stunned at his brilliant idea, or maybe both.

But really what kind of rule was that? How was making him stop saying aru making the world a better place?

But the thought of the new Italy frightened China and so he kept his mouth shut. And his fingers a crossed Italy wouldn't find out.

"China! That's a really good idea," France approved "umm... would you like the first batch we make?"

* * *

China knocked nervously on England's hotel door. Germany said that he would give making pepper spray a go. But the thing was it had been what? 10 minutes since Germany had said that and ended the meeting but nothing had happened. Yes China was on the impatient side but anyone would be if a crazed Italian turned Russian was possibly going to hunt you down and strangle you with pasta noodles in your sleep. China was also on the paranoid side.

Which brings us to why China was in front of England's hotel door. He was here to hopefully obtain a weapon until Germany made his pepper spray. He had heard during the meeting that America had been 'KO-ed' by England's cooking so hopefully it would provide a good temporary weapon.

China jumped as the door swung open.

"What do u want?" England muttered grumpily.

He needed to play his cards right to get England to cook for him.

"Well I heard your cooking was delicious so I was just hoping that I could try some scones." China said

Instantly England seemed to brighten up. "What are you doing out there come on in."

* * *

_2 hours later_

China was crouched behind a bush about to test out his newly acquired weapons. He wasn't too sure how America was KO-ed by the scones so he just assumed England threw them at America in a fit of rage, after all no one would actually voluntarily eat them...right? But he was dealing with a far more sinister force so he wasn't going to take any chances. Summoning all his might he hurled the scone at the figure hurrying down the street.

* * *

Lichtenstein was walking down the street. She spotted her brother at the end of the street and an happy smile popped onto her face. But as she hurried down the street something rock hard hit her straight in the face causing her to stumble backwards and lose her balance. She yelped in surprise and pain seeing stars.

"Lichtenstein!" Switzerland looked up to see his sister sprawled on the ground tears in her eyes.

Meanwhile China guilty shifted away.

* * *

A/N this chappie was kinda slow lol D:

U get a cookie if u work out what hit lichtenstein 8) its probably rlly obvious

leave a review? ;D


	7. Chapter 7

A/N hello

I'm still alive I've just been… you know.. being ninja hahhah….ha  
I'm so sorry update is extremely late (hey that rhymed ;D) but I still hope you enjoy it.

* * *

In the early hours of the morning, Italy was wide awake thinking. Recently he'd heard from one of his many sources; let's call him Bob142, that China had disobeyed his orders. Something had to be done about that but at the present moment he didn't have any ideas on how to make China's existence even more miserable.

Italy yawned before searching through his suitcase only to find that he'd only brought one pair of pants. He had been wearing this pair for nearly the whole conference. Well no matter his long Russian coat would cover his pants anyway.

* * *

When Italy entered, the meeting room fell silent. So this was the feeling of power. On the inside he giggled to himself. But he had a job to do today and needed to get on with it.

"China you said aru didn't you?"

There was a moment of stunned silence.

"How on earth did he know that," was the unspoken thought that flew out of France, England and Germany's open mouths and stabbed China through the heart. Metaphorically of course.

"Uhm.. isn't it a bit unfair to stop China from saying aru I mean it's not really causing the world any harm...uh never mind!" England quickly said when he saw the look Italy was giving him. Luckily for England Germany interrupted them.

"Everyone settle down, the meeting has started already."

Without taking his eyes off China Italy sat in his seat, a dark aura surrounding him.

The meeting commenced but there was an ominous air hovering about the meeting room, almost like something major was about to happen. Like they say there is always calm before the storm.

China meanwhile was having a mini nervous breakdown.

"Oh my gosh. He's going rip me to shreds and turn me into pasta. Oh god I'm never going to eat pasta ever again. Wait didn't pasta originate from me anyway. Why is this happening to me? Oh no was it because I threw a scone at Liechtenstein? Is this karma? If he kills me who's going to look after Panda-Chan? Okay calm down think China, there must be a way."

Suddenly China had an idea, if he could just get home. Italy would be no match for him in the streets of China where he was at his prime. Yeah! Perfect. Well he needed to wait for the meeting to end of course.

Time slowly ticked by. China shifted in his seat awkwardly, and whenever anyone looked at him he gave them his best poker face. Finally his impatience got the better of him; rising from his seat China declared that he was going to the toilet.

Instead of heading towards the restrooms, China darted off towards the main entrance. Screw his luggage and documents, his boss would understand, the only thing he did take was some English scones, sealed tightly in a plastic bag.

When he got into the taxi he grinned smugly. Mission accomplished. Although China knew no one was there, he couldn't help sticking his head out of the window and yelling "SUCK LOSERS." Or well he had meant to yell that. What really happened was China was greeted with the sight of Italy standing on the curb, his eyes boring imaginary holes into the taxi. He was so surprised he lost his ability to speak for a second. When he recovered the taxi had already sped far away from the building and more importantly Italy.

* * *

Not until the plane had safely landed in china did china relax. He felt much more comfortable in his homeland.

"Damn you Italy. Youngsters these days really need to learn to respect their elders aru. Yes that's right Italy aru aru aru aru aru. I'll say it whenever I want." China ranted to himself now filled to the brim with confidence.

Little did he know, Bob 123, one of Italy's many sources, had overheard the whole thing, and was now reporting back to Italy via text.

China passed security without incident, though people did glance suspiciously at his lack of luggage. He entered a cab and spoke in rapid mandarin to the driver who nodded and swerved into the traffic. So far so good.

"I'm finally safe from that crazy Italian," China grinned to himself "Wait what if he followed me..? No that's not possible right..? haha…ha."

Just to prove the voice in his head wrong, China turned around to check the curb. He was met with the sight of a Kol-ing Italy

"Is this some kind of bad joke?"

* * *

A/N And we're going to China ;D this is like the part leading up to the ending :L so sorry if it feels like nothing much is happening.

okay this chapter sounded really awkward sorry I haven't written in ages. I hope people are still reading this D:

Oh yeah and cookies for all ;D (what you don't know is that they're actually tracking cookies. fufufufufufufu ) LOL Nah I joke :P

R&R ;D


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